Why Worry?

I've been noticeably absent lately.

Both in my blog and in myself, I suppose you could say.

I haven't felt settled for the past couple of weeks. Part of that, I'm sure, comes from the merriment and general hoopla surrounding the wedding of my beautiful sister and wonderful brother-in-law. There had been so much to do before the wedding--daily, I found myself doing something that related back to their coming nuptials. And then, when it was said and done, my calendar became very empty. At first, I reveled in that! I'm an introvert who loves creating things, and it's easiest to write, craft, read, etc., by oneself. 

But the problem with my being alone for too long is that my thoughts start to wander and build up. And 99% of them are worries.

What if...I can't juggle grad school and teaching?

What if...all this writing I do is for naught?

What if...my wedding never comes?

What if...I never get to visit New Zealand?

What if...I'm not eating healthy enough and my heart gives out?

What if...they're not texting me back because that one time I didn't text them back, and now they're trying to "give me a taste of my own medicine?"

What if...my tv goes out when the new season of Game of Thrones debuts?

What if...I move out of my parents' house but become a hermit?

What if...I can't figure out how to move my current WIP along?

What if...someone eats all of the popcorn?

Sometimes, when my mind starts racing like this, I feel like a character in a movie when the camera starts to spin around them and you can hear the words of other characters or that character's thoughts and it just goes faster and faster until the character screams or it all just descends into silence.

I'm a worrier, I always have been, and the other night, I was worrying about something silly, more than likely. But it was one of those things that seems so much bigger and important when you're worrying about it. Anyway, I happened to be scrolling through Pinterest as I was laying in bed, trying to stop thinking about these things. I do that sometimes and usually end up looking at Supernatural things, which make me smile. 

But for some reason, I happened across this graphic:

BAM! Does anyone else feel the power behind that statement? As a writer, I use my imagination constantly; it never clicked in my brain that I'm also using it when I worry. I mean, usually when I think of IMAGINATION, I think of this:

NOT all the dark things your brain says to you in the wee hours of the night/day.

I find that notion completely powerful, and already, in the past couple days, when I feel myself start to worry, I have a mental shift. Like the little voice in my head is saying something like, "Girl, we are not wasting your imagination on that. Now, what would happen if the Winchesters showed up at your door?" A much better use for one's imagination, let me tell you!

Anyway, I hope this thought brings you comfort, fellow worriers. As I read once somewhere, worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but you don't go anywhere. 

And, as always, stay gold!