My Life as an Overthinker
Many thoughts are rattling around in my head as I sit down to write this blog post. Thoughts about people and human nature and why we do and say the things we do. I've come to the conclusion that people are messy, and we can never, ever understand other people in totality.
Definitely doing some overthinking here.
Which is a great segue into my topic for today! I am not a self-help book reader, usually. Many of the books I have read that fall into this category have been specifically for teachers or through a book club at school, and none have really done what I needed them to do for me.
And then Anne Bogel wrote Don't Overthink It.
First, let me just say that I love her website. I meant to link it last week in the post, but I didn't, because I'm a failure as a blogger. So here is a link to Modern Mrs. Darcy. And here also is a link to Barnes and Noble and Amazon's page for this book, in case you want to get one for yourself. You should do that. Don't overthink it, and just listen to me.
I'm only on chapter 5, and I'm already learning things about myself.
{By the way, my thoughts took a long and circuitous path as I jotted down ideas for this post, so just roll with me as I flit about.}
Part 1 is titled "Set Yourself up for Success." Anne shares anecdotes and research and her own thoughts on why she overthought--and why it is so easy to fall into that habit of overthinking every little decision in our lives.
And if you know me at all, you know I'm an overthinker. Not with everything, but with certain things. I'm an "experiential" overthinker. Like, if I can't decide to do something or go somewhere, sometimes I just procrastinate to make the decision until the clock makes the decision for me. Oops, didn't RSVP in time, can't go. Oops, missed the audition day, oh well, maybe next year. And I'm a huge overthinker when it comes to dating...woof. That's just a whole other post waiting to happen. And it'll just keep waiting, until the time runs out. Oh darn, well maybe on my next blog. Dating, other big life decisions...things I think you are validated in thinking about, but maybe not overthinking about.
And don't even get me started on social overthinking. Why didn't they text me back? They must be mad about something I did. What did I do? Oh no, did I forget to wish them Happy Birthday on Facebook? I texted them and sent them a card, but I forgot to post on Facebook! I'd hate me, too. What a terrible person I am.
One of the first nuggets of wisdom that Anne doles out that really stuck with me was in chapter 4, "Decide what Matters." She said to make a list of what you value. It can be tangible or intangible things, doesn't matter. Just make a list. And then these things become your priorities. You don't have to overthink about these things anymore. If "being there for family" is a priority, and your cousin gets married on the beach, then you don't have to overthink your decision to buy plane tickets and take a few days off work. If it is possible for you to be there without going into debt, then you show up, because you've already established that spending time with your family is a priority, something you value.
At the end of the chapter, she leaves lines for you to do this. Because I can't write in books, I grabbed some sticky notes and wrote down the things I value. Here is what my list said:
I've lumped some things together for the sake of brevity. For example, creativity includes writing, crafting in various forms, acting, etc.
Creating the list, however, has brought me to a new dilemma in my path of overthinking {and I am sincerely hoping this is addressed in the next chapter, "Take Time to Make Time"}. How exactly do you prioritize these things? And find time for them all?
Using my list as an example, I wrote down "family" and "creativity." Let's just say, I have slotted out some time on a Saturday to write. Not on my blog, but just write one of the many stories floating around in my brain. But then, a spontaneous family gathering is planned! The first thing my brain is saying is, "How dare you, you know I'm an introvert who loves planning!" But once it gets past its initial huff, I start overthinking what I should do. I already had this time designated for writing. If writing is one of the things I value, then I should be making time for it. But family is also something I value, so I shouldn't be overthinking this...
Do you see where this is going?
And there are only so many hours in a day. How on earth can I do all of the things that I value and want to put time into while still getting a semi-decentish amount of sleep and showing up to work with enough mental energy to do what needs to be done? And eating, because that has to happen. And showering--you're welcome, everyone.
Am I overthinking this? Probably.
Now that we've segued once again into "time management," I think perhaps it is time to draw this post to a close. Not because I don't have more to say, but because I'm not sure what I have left to say is worth reading.
Last week, I wrote that I was going to do some kind of giveaway this week. I am not 100% sure what that giveaway is going to be. It is no longer the season for wearing thick knitted socks. I've already given away coffee. I have zero time, otherwise I would give away some kind of "time with the blogger" {which, obviously, everyone would be dying to have...though I don't know what we would do...maybe I could help you organize/clean something? Or we could get drinks or food? Or I could proofread something? This is obviously not very fleshed out...maybe later}.
Oh! I've got it! The perfect thing! In addition to being a professional overthinker, I am also a chronic notebook hoarder. I'm like a dragon, but with notebooks and pads of paper and pens instead of gold. Anyway, if you comment on this blog post, whether on Facebook or in the comment section at the bottom, I will enter you into the drawing to win this fabulous notebook {thanks, Jane Austen, for being my Vanna White}.
Comment with your thoughts on overthinking, your time-management tips, your opinion on the current season of Outlander, who you think the Kitty is on The Masked Singer... No spoilers please, but every topic is open!
Definitely doing some overthinking here.
Which is a great segue into my topic for today! I am not a self-help book reader, usually. Many of the books I have read that fall into this category have been specifically for teachers or through a book club at school, and none have really done what I needed them to do for me.
And then Anne Bogel wrote Don't Overthink It.
I'm only on chapter 5, and I'm already learning things about myself.
{By the way, my thoughts took a long and circuitous path as I jotted down ideas for this post, so just roll with me as I flit about.}
Part 1 is titled "Set Yourself up for Success." Anne shares anecdotes and research and her own thoughts on why she overthought--and why it is so easy to fall into that habit of overthinking every little decision in our lives.
And if you know me at all, you know I'm an overthinker. Not with everything, but with certain things. I'm an "experiential" overthinker. Like, if I can't decide to do something or go somewhere, sometimes I just procrastinate to make the decision until the clock makes the decision for me. Oops, didn't RSVP in time, can't go. Oops, missed the audition day, oh well, maybe next year. And I'm a huge overthinker when it comes to dating...woof. That's just a whole other post waiting to happen. And it'll just keep waiting, until the time runs out. Oh darn, well maybe on my next blog. Dating, other big life decisions...things I think you are validated in thinking about, but maybe not overthinking about.
And don't even get me started on social overthinking. Why didn't they text me back? They must be mad about something I did. What did I do? Oh no, did I forget to wish them Happy Birthday on Facebook? I texted them and sent them a card, but I forgot to post on Facebook! I'd hate me, too. What a terrible person I am.
One of the first nuggets of wisdom that Anne doles out that really stuck with me was in chapter 4, "Decide what Matters." She said to make a list of what you value. It can be tangible or intangible things, doesn't matter. Just make a list. And then these things become your priorities. You don't have to overthink about these things anymore. If "being there for family" is a priority, and your cousin gets married on the beach, then you don't have to overthink your decision to buy plane tickets and take a few days off work. If it is possible for you to be there without going into debt, then you show up, because you've already established that spending time with your family is a priority, something you value.
At the end of the chapter, she leaves lines for you to do this. Because I can't write in books, I grabbed some sticky notes and wrote down the things I value. Here is what my list said:
 |
| Please ignore the stupid shadow and my trash handwriting...that's what 9 pm looks like for me |
Creating the list, however, has brought me to a new dilemma in my path of overthinking {and I am sincerely hoping this is addressed in the next chapter, "Take Time to Make Time"}. How exactly do you prioritize these things? And find time for them all?
Using my list as an example, I wrote down "family" and "creativity." Let's just say, I have slotted out some time on a Saturday to write. Not on my blog, but just write one of the many stories floating around in my brain. But then, a spontaneous family gathering is planned! The first thing my brain is saying is, "How dare you, you know I'm an introvert who loves planning!" But once it gets past its initial huff, I start overthinking what I should do. I already had this time designated for writing. If writing is one of the things I value, then I should be making time for it. But family is also something I value, so I shouldn't be overthinking this...
Do you see where this is going?
And there are only so many hours in a day. How on earth can I do all of the things that I value and want to put time into while still getting a semi-decentish amount of sleep and showing up to work with enough mental energy to do what needs to be done? And eating, because that has to happen. And showering--you're welcome, everyone.
Am I overthinking this? Probably.
Now that we've segued once again into "time management," I think perhaps it is time to draw this post to a close. Not because I don't have more to say, but because I'm not sure what I have left to say is worth reading.
Last week, I wrote that I was going to do some kind of giveaway this week. I am not 100% sure what that giveaway is going to be. It is no longer the season for wearing thick knitted socks. I've already given away coffee. I have zero time, otherwise I would give away some kind of "time with the blogger" {which, obviously, everyone would be dying to have...though I don't know what we would do...maybe I could help you organize/clean something? Or we could get drinks or food? Or I could proofread something? This is obviously not very fleshed out...maybe later}.
Oh! I've got it! The perfect thing! In addition to being a professional overthinker, I am also a chronic notebook hoarder. I'm like a dragon, but with notebooks and pads of paper and pens instead of gold. Anyway, if you comment on this blog post, whether on Facebook or in the comment section at the bottom, I will enter you into the drawing to win this fabulous notebook {thanks, Jane Austen, for being my Vanna White}.
Comments
Post a Comment